Laughable - "With Doom We Come" Review (0%)

People listen to Summoning?

I just wanted to let our readers know that there are still people out there - okay, three or four - who are actually listening to Summoning albums.

There are adults who will actually purchase the above album.

There are people who think that Summoning is a real band that actually makes art that is deserving of a real, honest appraisal, as opposed to, you know... reality.

No, I didn't make that up.

And no, I didn't listen to the "With Doom We Come" album because I DON'T FUCKING NEED TO.

Every Summoning album sounds identical not just to other Summoning albums, but to the entire pile of crap that ever came out of the DSBM "scene".

Their music is like a "hard" rock version of Disney stuff... That's the best way I could possibly describe it.

They are low, low, low, low in quality, but always eager to prove how they are "true black metal" by "dissing" other artists that make up the scene, on Facebook and Instagram of all places.

Laughable

Let's just admit the truth: Summoning were never black metal.

At best they are an alt-rock boy band with distorted vocals. At worst, emo.

There is no effort, vision and even less talent that went into making this album With Doom We Come.

It's just black metal aesthetics wrapped around emo/grunge/crunkcore riffs that go nowhere, don't develop atmosphere, and just hang around for about 8 minutes before fading away for no reason.

And drum machines... in the "current year".

Even more annoying than war metal, Summoning is to black metal what deathcore is to death metal - a pale imitation done by incompetent posers with daddy issues.

Summoning should have called themselves Tokio Hotel part 2 as this isn't music that invokes feelings of awe, dread or even melancholy, like the best of Darkthrone and Burzum, but rather the soundtrack of a Z-list movie that starts playing during the scene where the protagonist cries - alone - in his bathroom after getting dumped by his boyfriend and contracting HIV.

Summoning has never "summoned" anything other than anti-homophobia advocate groups who thought - wrongly - that Summoning's music was mocking them, when in fact it was just Protector's awkward attempt at coming out of the closet.

This band is shit, it makes even Watain sound virile.

With Doom We Come score: 0/100.

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