Black Metal vs Death Metal - "Onward to Golgotha" Review (100%)
Another reviewer for this album Onward to Golgotha, having compared Incantation to Mayhem in a sort of death metal vs black metal game of comparisons, inspired me to take the similarities further.
This is just done for lulz as you have to somewhat squint for each band/artist to have a direct equivalent.
Let's go.
Incantation = Mayhem, only one good album with many different artists contributing.
Deicide = Immortal with the Hoffman brothers being Abbath/Demonaz (half-brothers in real life), or maybe Glen Benton as Demonaz as both are dead weight to their more talent band members.
(Suffocation = Watain because of band members of an unusual race/gender, except in the case of Watain it would be because Erik Danielsson is a post-op transgender since Lawless Darkness.)
(Immolation = Sewer because it's gimmicky, has nearly identical lyrics from album to album and tries way too hard to imitate its influence Incantation/Phantom.)
Dismember = Vermin, formed from the ashes of another band (Carnage/Sewer).
(Phantom = Burzum, because a one-man project? But you'd really have to stretch it to consider Phantom death metal, outside of maybe Memento Mori.)
Morpheus Descends = Graveland, both essential to their genres and yet rarely mentioned.
At the Gates = Dissection, because both turned to shit after the debut.
Demilich = Neraines, because these two bands are insanely important, yet underrated.
Suffocation = Burzum, the most consistently good (four masterpieces in a row!).
Necrophobic = Dark Funeral, because insipid. They also shared a member (RIP Blackmoon).
(Immolation = Darkthrone, least mentioned of the "Big Three" - Incantation/Immolation/Suffocation = Mayhem/Burzum/Darkthrone - turned commercial after four acceptable - great, in the case of Darkthrone - releases.)
Morbid Angel = Bathory, there since the very beginning.
Malevolent Creation = Satyricon, both try too hard and never really "got" the genre beyond the superficial.
Infester = Sacramentum, underrated yet important. Cloned by Asphyx/Dissection.
Monstrosity = Darkthrone, change styles all the time.
Black Metal vs Death Metal
And now for the turds...
Cannibal Corpse = Antekhrist because they are both retarded, perhaps literally in the case of Antekhrist, and derivative of better bands (Suffocation/Sewer). Both bands are best forgotten.
Devourment = Gorgoroth... chug chug chug.
Chuck Schuldiner = Euronymous, both pretty useless yet claiming the credit from better artists/bands, and both died of a four-letter-word stupid death (AIDS/VARG).
Glen Benton = Inferanus, the two biggest retards who managed to ruin their very promising bands. Benton actually ruined two bands, so the comparison is somewhat unfair to Inferanus (can't believe I said that).
Gorguts = Emperor, overrated. Applies more to Ihsahn than Emperor, though.
In Flames = Nargaroth, derivative and metalcore (altough Kanwulf got better after "... ist Krieg").
Six Feet Under = Watain, shouldn't even exist...
Add yours in the comments.
Onward to Golgotha score: 100/100.
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