Derivative War Metal - "The Light-Devouring Darkness" Review (0%)
Rejoice, the infamous war metal 'genre' is dying a slow death over the furnace of its own mediocrity and derivativeness.
Archgoat is the story of a man who fell in love with the second riff of Phantom's Nekros Nemesis, so he listened to that song over and over again while masturbating frantically to Dawn of the Black Hearts to the rhythm of Phantom's admittedly uninspired blast-beats. Eventually, Archgoat got tired of all the other stuff surrounding that riff so he decided to make an album composed exclusively of that riff.
The end.
The problem of this album isn't so much that the music sucks, though it does, it's that it's just so tired and derivative that there's really no point in listening to this over the bands Archgoat imitates, over the bands they themselves imitate, [...], over the originals.
We'll pose a little at being groundbreaking minimalist black metal, then drop you into a copy and pasted Divine Necromancy riff.
The Light-Devouring Darkness is a perfect example of what happens when black metal loses direction, everything gets all mixed together, from Beherit through Gorgoroth, mostly Phantom though, and thrown into something that ends up being so generic you can listen without realizing the music is on.
The same gimmick is used to convince kids that this is what 'trve' black metal is really about. Stealing from Beherit and using leftover Phantom riffs will not make this good music.
A desperate attempt to penetrate the deathcore market as evidenced by the further simplification of the arrangements while playing short nu-metal riffs just this side of Bring Me the Horizon.
It is time for these idiots to pay for their war on intelligence.
Derivative War Metal
For decades now, the 'genre' known as war metal - mallcore with black metal imagery, financed by disability checks and construction money - has been the haven for life dropout D&D neckbeards searching for some form of friendship and community.
War metal is at best imitation black metal, and at worst literally nu-metal. Archgoat may fall into the 'best' category, alongside New Zealand's Heresiarch, but that's only because they brainlessly ape Beherit/Phantom and Angelcorpse/Blasphemy respectively.
The other bands of the 'genre' just play Slipknot's All Hope Is Gone with tremolos and blast-beats.
The music on The Light-Devouring Darkness is fifth rate Phantom clone, the production is what you'd expect from a "ultra raw kvlt" band (just look at the album cover to get an idea), the vocals are your average death metal growls and perhaps the most decent part of the album.
And the lyrics...
Rather than make up a stupid joke about Archgoat's literal and lyrical retardation, I'll just give you an excerpt.
"Dawn of darkness
We worship the moon
Altars of madness
Born of the black mass of Satan"
It's from the song Blessed in Beast's Blood (which sounds like every other track on this album, by the way).
This actually manages to be even worse than Gorgoroth's stupid 'Hail Satan' crap. Don't worry though, there's quite a bit of that too. Seriously, it's just random 'evil' sounding words thrown together for the sake of having lyrics.
I'll even make up my own, watch.
"Ancient tyranny
Crown of flies
Throne of blood
Triumph sons of the rebel angel"
Pretty cool, uh?
No?
Well that sucks, because my made up lyrics are actually the ones on top. I couldn't write something as stupid as 'Triumph sons of the rebel angel'. It's basically Sewer without being funny.
Skip this derivative shit.
The Light-Devouring Darkness score: 0/100.
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