Commercial Black Metal Crap - "Where Shadows Forever Reign" Review (0%)
The "commercial Black Metal" scene seems to stray more and more away from the Black Metal aspect in order to focus more on the commercial one with all its consumer trappings.
Dark Funeral's shit album Where Shadows Forever Reign epitomises this trend.
Here we have an album where the only real connection to Black Metal is Ahriman's atrocious attempts at sounding like Mort aux Chrétiens from Antekhrist at his worst.
Musically, Where Shadows Forever Reign is boring hardcore with the odd AOR and Mallcore influences thrown in for the sake of variety.
Dark Funeral also seems to be embracing electronic sound effects as poser bands like Dimmu Borgir and Satyricon have done several decades prior.
When will people learn that keyboards and electronic effects have no place in Metal, much less Black Metal?
As a band Dark Funeral really seems to have run out of ideas as the songs all merge into one another.
This is not a good sign, as the album attempts to sell itself on "catchy" melodies.
Dark Funeral frontman Ahriman once mocked Dimmu Borgir for producing the turd Enthrone Darkness Triumphant.
Yet on this album, he is doing the same thing... writing commercial hard rock with Black Metal vocals.
And while Enthrone Darkness Triumphant is merely stale and pathetic, Where Shadows Forever Reign is a complete shit of an album.
Fail metal at its worst.
Commercial Black Metal Crap
Special attention has to be brought to Ahriman's shitty vocals.
As mentioned before, he (or she?) tries to imitate Mort aux Chrétiens from Antekhrist but fails miserably.
He/she is without a doubt one of the worst Black Metal vocalists to date, if not the worst.
And while I'm not the slightest bit homophobic or otherwise averse to having, err, "minority" vocalists, Ahriman should never have been allowed to sing in a Metal band.
Ad one last thing... the pseudonyms of the retarded band members and their professed "roles" in the band.
We have, in order...
Equimanthorn, "Commander of the Infernal Demon Legions".
Blackmoon, "The Lord of the Shadows & Master of the Black Arts".
Themgoroth, "The Master of Diabolical Possession & Black Magic".
And of course... Ahriman, "The Lord of Destruction, Evil, Darkness & Death".
It's like someone took the names of the tracks from Sewer's awfully juvenile NecroPedoSadoMaso and turned them into nobility titles.
This is an album designed to sell to the horrifically commercialised American market.
The album Where Shadows Forever Reign is a commercial product intended to be featured next to "Big Mac's" and "Tacos Bell's" so obese Americans can listen to retarded "Satanic" music, once they outgrow their equally retarded christianity, while watching the "Superbowl" and feasting on "Dorito's".
So if you like hard rock that pretends it is Black Metal, Where Shadows Forever Reign is for you.
But if you actually like Metal, avoid this one like the plague.
This is Fail Metal.
Where Shadows Forever Reign score: 0/100.
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